Competition…
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Women are the creators of life. Nurturers by NATURE! We come in different creeds, ethnicities, colors, shapes, and sizes. As different as we are, it seems that women are ultimately after the same objectives. Those objectives tend to be whatever goals or accomplishments we have set for ourselves. Goals can be career driven, matters of the heart, or starting and stabilizing a family. So, if women are aiming for the same things, why are we constantly competing against one another?!
Everyday via social media, there are categories pitting women against each other. Skinny vs. Thick, long hair vs. short hair, natural hair vs. weaved hair, etc. Have you ever been standing next to a female friend, and a woman walks into a room and your friend just starts to denigrate the poor woman from head to toe? What is that about?
Have we forgotten about the women’s rights movement and the Women’s suffrage of the 1800’s? If that’s too far in the past for you how about The “Feminist” movement of the 1960’s. I have “Feminist” in quotes because when used it’s meant to be negative even though the true meaning is NOT!! Did we forget that women are still a minority (Well technically we aren’t but I’ll save that for another blog)?
It seems as if everything has been forgotten. Is this a matter of jealousy or low self-esteem? I mean, you would HAVE to have low self-esteem to tear another woman down, especially a woman that you don’t personally know. Maybe it’s plain old jealousy. You’re disgruntled because she makes more money than you, right? You’re upset because another woman didn’t make the same life choices that you made. Whatever the reason or rationale is for the constant competition between women, it is wasted ENERGY! Wasted negative energy doesn’t do anything but allow you to feel drained, overwhelmed, and miserable. Energy can not be destroyed, but it can be transferred. So, the next time you feel that you have to compete with another woman, remember the real competition is YOURSELF!
I do agree…we need to uplift and inspire one another. If she has something you want ask her how she got it…and then you work to get it. If that’s what you want…
I agree also. It’s exactly what u said. Hair, shape, clothes and money or the lack of all these things is something that women put in the negative. Remember when u were young, or hell being grown, it’s been that one female u just don’t like? Don’t know anything about her or her story but can’t stand the sight of? I think it’s some sort of auto-jealous gene we have inside of us. Some women come off as being stuck up (as I have been accused ) on many occasion and they really are super cool. If a sistah walks in the joint looking good, exuding confidence, many females automatically lookin like “who this bitch think she is?”. I’m not gonna sit here like I don’t talk about women when I see something that may be flawed, we all do, and we’d be lying if we didn’t!! But I’m also quick to compliment a sistah just the same. It’ll never change, we are the evil bitches that the Lord created…he makes no mistake….No?
Maybe one day we as women will be able to work together as a unit and won’t think of each other as competition.
No matter how “Smart” we get ad a society our animalistic nature will always remain in control. We will always seek food shelter and reproduction. So in a sense it is always a competition for women since they out number men 3-4-5 to 1. Women want to nest with a good man. Since the number of men particularly good men is very slim women have to find a way to increase their chances of finding one. If women were smart they would stick together find a good man and have 3 incomes in stead of 2. Its becoming very clear that there just aren’t enough men for every woman to have one of their own. In stead of being miserable alone you might want to try to be happy as a group. A lot of cultures participate in this. Not sure why American women won’t get out their feelings and find them some happiness.
I encourage you to look up the word womanist coined by Alice Walker. I sort of agree with Coop that competing is part of our animalistic nature, but I think their are ways to compete in a more healthy manner. Whether we know it or not, we are competing with someone for something. But the type of competition you are talking about is the type where we degrade one another and that type of “competition” is just like you said a waste of energy and destructive. I used to be one of those women that would look at a woman and pick her apart head to toe, because I was insecure, then one day I just thought, how would I feel if someone did that to me? People probably still do it to me, but that doesn’t matter, what matter is I’ve changed my behavior. And when I’m with other woman that do it, I ask them why do they care? It’s really that simple, she got a gut and she’s wearing a crop top…ok but why do you care? Is she bothering or hurting you in anyway? That’s just a lightweight example. This sounds cliche lol but we need to start having sister circles or something like that, to let other women know we shouldn’t be enemies to each other and we can uplift each other and compete in healthy ways.